These are the words my friend opened with today in her ’30 Days for Peace’ Facebook group. She asked us to take just five minutes, breathe…and be still.
As I read them this morning, I thought, “okay, no problem, I can find five minutes.” It is now 7:32pm and instead of being still, I am writing to you. Granted, stillness with am almost 2-year-old, two kittens & a puppy is pretty close to impossible, but surely I filled all of my possible 5 minutes with lots of stuff.
The next thing on my list, checking email, checking Facebook, meeting a friend, making a phone call – using all my minutes as much as possible.
Somehow stillness seems wasteful, like I just threw away those minutes when I could have been productive. What is it about stillness that is so hard for us (especially those of us in America)?
Another friend recently returned from a grueling last summer session of her graduate school and felt terrible about three days on the couch and sleeping so much. From the outside, I could completely justify this “wasting of time.” She earned it, needed it, and deserved it. Her body clearly agreed. I kept trying to tell her it was okay. The verdict is out on whether she believed me.
In turn, why can’t I take my 5 minutes? Don’t I earn it, need it, and deserve it too? I don’t think I have a solution or answer. Stillness is hard, awkward, and guilt-inducing. But I suppose the only way to get passed all that is to start.
So, not right now…a little later, after some more stuff, I’m going to take my 5 minutes. Really, I am.